Immediate Compassion and Contentment in the Face of Suffering is Possible for All

God is Not Sitting Somewhere Far Away in the Sky.

God is the tree in the forests that

allows itself to die and will not defend itself in front of those

with the ax, not wanting to cause them

shame.

—Kabir

We are taught that God is not near us but far away, looking down at us from a great distance, on an all-powerful throne. This image of God (or Source, or the Universe) does not portray God as residing within each of us, in our Heart. But that is where the Source really is, and that is how to tap into presence and compassion in any moment.

Recently, I watched a scene from an older, black-and-white Hindi film. In this particular clip, the scene portrayed something remarkable, to me: compassion and humility in the face of anger and suffering. In this scene, a woman is talking to a man who is clearly upset, and he suddenly throws a full glass of water into her face. In response, the woman could have been reactive and began yelling insults or expressing offense to him for throwing water into her face. How many of us would react in such a way at a perceived offensive gesture? The ego takes it all very personally and reacts like that.

To my surprise and delight, the female character in this Hindi movie scene did something remarkable. After the man threw water in her face, she did not react with anger; instead, she stood completely still before the man who had just thrown water at her, then she moved towards him, gently embracing him. This was complete non-ego action instead of defensive impulse, which would surely have created more anger and shame in the male character (who is suffering from a mental health condition, in the movie plot). What happened in the following moments? The man’s agitated emotional state melted away. The whole argument surrendered to being in harmony with each other, then and there. They held each other with warm silence, in a small boat together, surrounded by vast ocean. Healing, or oneness, happens through dissolving one’s personal identity and being present with loving attention, in a given moment. It takes surrendering, or radical acceptance, of all the dragged baggage and perceived flaws.

In one translation of The Bhagavad Gita, Ramesh Balsekar calls this dissolving of self the Indwelling Consciousness, or impersonal awareness. In the Bible, Christ tells his disciples that he and his Father are one, which is associated with transcending personal identity and becoming one with God. Guru Nanak, in the Siddh Goṣṭ, points to the internal true wisdom that is produced within, and the awareness of its sound as devotion. The Tao by Lao Tzu has a concept called the uncarved block, which is associated with the impersonal awareness, vast potential, and our unconditioned innermost self. There are many lenses, all pointing to the impersonal awareness as a way to embody compassion and contentment. Reactions may still happen, as we each have our own tendencies and conditioning, but the underlying peace remains through grace, no matter what the shifting, changing world presents to us.

Can the impulse to defend oneself be dropped or willed away by force? I don’t know. But it can be seen as it comes and goes, without acting on it. Whether that is will, or sheer grace, is beyond me. But, I have witnessed firsthand how awareness can create space in our most heated interactions. This simple awareness creates, in turn, more ease and peace.

Peace is just easefulness, to me. It is beyond personal preferences, beyond noncreative imagination, beyond personal identity, and beyond mindless chatter. It is seen in acceptance, warm silence, compassion, and spontaneous acts of kindness that expect absolutely nothing in return. It is also seen in not “keeping score.” The impersonal awareness frees the individual from the load of expectations.

We hear a lot about the trait of humility. I don’t know whether talking about humility actually creates more humility. Humility is associated with letting one’s defensive impulse come and go without reacting. Said another way, it is like allowing the dissolving of one’s rigid personal identity into the wholeness of being. For example, when we are able to look anger and suffering in the eyes while showing compassion, centeredness, and warmth—this is an expression of true humility. And when humility happens in us, we won’t even label it humility but simply being present, or oneness.

I see the tree in Kabir’s poem as a mystical, wise witness of the tree-cutters’ blind efforts. Perhaps the tree senses the internal suffering of the ones cutting down life with their heavy axes. The tree stays silent, but not out of fear; the tree says nothing in its own defense and allows itself to be cut down. Why? Kabir points to this: defending oneself, oftentimes, creates shame in the other. In allowing oneself to be “cut down,” in certain instances (for example taking an insult gracefully instead of snapping back impulsively), we may create compassion and contentment within ourselves and avoid creating shame in the other. How wonderful!

In Kabir’s poem, impersonal awareness (and its immediate fruits of compassion and contentment) is associated with the character of the tree itself.

How might we be more like the wise tree? And, less like the tree-cutter?